


Living The Lie

by mvpwhovian



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Hallucifer, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Kinda Dark, One Shot, takes place in season seven, yes I know that was forever ago
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 17:24:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5425517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mvpwhovian/pseuds/mvpwhovian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is constantly trying to convince himself of what is real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Living The Lie

**Author's Note:**

> This was written a long time ago, but I've decided to post it now.

Sam Winchester doesn’t remember his time in hell. Well, at least for now. Bits and pieces have have leaked through the wall Death had put up in his mind. His precious barrier, keeping his sanity in place, was crumbling. Sam sometimes wondered how Dean dealt with his memories of hell, but then again, Dean’s soul hadn’t been stuck in a cage with Lucifer and Michael, both of whom had nothing better to take their anger out on. Sam sighed and rested his head on his hands. He had been seeing Lucifer for a few weeks now. He told no one, but it was only a matter of time before they put the pieces together. Sam was always skittish and flinching at every little noise. Not to mention that it had been five or six days since Sam last got sleep. Lucifer didn’t seem to like it when Sam got a moments peace.   
“Sam I’m going out. You need anything?” Dean inquired.   
“No, I’m good thanks.” Dean shrugged, and walked out their motel room’s door, leaving Sam alone.   
Sam glanced around the cheap room, a small feeling of paranoia slowly growing inside him. This happened every time Sam was alone. He saw shadows move in the corner of his eye, but nothing was ever out of place. He would hear an assortment of strange noises, but never saw anything that caused them. Sam knew what he was seeing and hearing wasn’t real, but he couldn’t seem to convince his brain that. Sam knew he was going to show up, but he still jumped at the hand on his shoulder.   
“Dear me Sammy, did I scare you?” Sam didn’t give Lucifer a response, he always tried not to.   
“Sam, how long are you gonna keep this up? Not that I’m complaining, I’m having fun, but just give me an estimate on how long you’re going to keep believing that this is all real?” Sam couldn’t stop himself from shooting a concerned look at the fallen angel and muttering, “What?” Lucifer smirked.   
“That’s right Sammy, you never left. You’re still my bunk buddy down there.” Sam shook his head.   
“No. I made it out. You’re just a hallucination.” Lucifer smiled and gave a small laugh.   
“I have to say, this,” He gestured to the room around them. “is my best torture yet. Letting you believe you were free. Giving you a taste of what you left behind when you jumped in the cage. How heroic was that? Your brothers still mourning you up there you know. Still blaming himself for what happened, wondering why it had to be his poor little Sammy that took the fall instead of him-”   
“Shut up.” Sam interrupted.   
“Ooh what’s the matter Sam? Don’t like what you’re hearing? Or that fact that it makes sense? Do you really think Death is that nice of a guy to get you your soul back? Nah, he could really care less about your race let alone one little hunter.” Sam’s breathing and heart rate had quickened. No, don’t let yourself even consider it. He thought to himself. You’re back. You made it. You...you left him behind. He’s nothing but a memory now.   
“Come on Sam, think about it.” Lucifer started pacing slow circles around Sam. “You and your brother have survived so much. Died more than anyone else I know. How long did you think that luck would last? And do you really think it would extend to escaping the cage…?” Lucifer stopped behind Sam. “No, me either.”   
“I left you in the cage...You can’t hurt me anymore.”   
“Ooh but I can Sammy.” Lucifer was quite close to Sam now. “I’ll never let you go. I enjoy having you around too much to ever let you leave. Now, this little game of ours, it's over when you choose you know. You choose when to stop living the lie, and I think you’ve known this for a while now. I also think that’s why we’ve been cleaning our gun.” Sam glanced to the half cleaned gun on the table.   
“No.” Lucifer walked away from Sam and looked out the small window, which immediately frosted over.   
“Don’t be so sure Sam. You’ll get tired of this eventually. When you’ve forgotten what sleep feels like, when you can’t take the pain anymore,” He turned back to Sam. “when your brother leaves you. And he will Sam. Everyone will leave you when they find out what’s going on in your head.” Sam jumped when he heard the motel door open. His brother entered with a six pack of beer, and Lucifer was nowhere to be seen.   
“Well that didn’t take as long as I thought it was going to, turns out there’s a place next door that sells beer. How great is that?” Dean stopped when he saw his brother’s face. “Hey you okay?” Sam gave a small nod.   
“Yeah I’m...I’m fine.”


End file.
